PAIN to Power: The Martial Arts Mindset That Defies Chronic Arthritis | Gary Stringer | MMP Talks (30)

[00:00:00] But then, one day in 1990, all that changed. Instantly. I woke up, I couldn't move. I asked her the question, at the risk of losing a student, is everything alright at home? And it all came out. Years of abuse and what else. We only fail when we stop trying. We have to keep moving. It doesn't matter what life throws in front of you. Everybody has bumps in the road.

[00:00:38] On the 7th of July 1964, I set foot on a path that's ended up with me being here today. And God knows where I'll be tomorrow. Who knows? But on that day, I took my first steps into the world of martial arts.

[00:00:54] And since then, it's been the journey that's took me all over the world. I've met and trained with the legends. I've taught alongside a few. I've lost a few due to old age and illness. But I still continue on my journey.

[00:01:08] Now this talk will be in sort of two parts, because that's how my life's been, if you like, in two halves. I'm going to give you a little bit of background first, because it will make sense to what I tell you later on.

[00:01:19] By the time I was in my teens, I was travelling to London regularly to train with Charles Mack Sensei. Charles Mack Sensei was the first Occidental to be awarded multiple Dan grades from the Kodokan in Japan.

[00:01:33] By 1985-86, I was travelling to the Isle of Dogs to train with Sensei Tommy Baldwin in his art of Bujitsu and Jiu-Jitsu. And similarly, I was travelling to the other side of London to train with Professor Brian Dossett in his martial arts spirit combat.

[00:01:49] I was hungry for knowledge all the time, like a sponge absorbing stuff. And I still am. But I just love it. I couldn't get enough of it.

[00:01:59] By 1988, I was lucky enough to be interviewed by Bay Logan from Combat Magazine. If you've been around in martial arts for any length of time, you'll remember Combat Fighters, Martial Arts Illustrated.

[00:02:09] Bay dubbed me at that time as one of the most effective martial artists in the UK. Why am I telling you all this? What does it link into?

[00:02:21] Having met people like Fimo De Mora, Larry Hartsell became my mentor and Jun Fan JKD. And later, I qualified as a JKD instructor under Larry Hartsell.

[00:02:32] Also met and trained with Danny Inosanto and Wally Jay, the founder of Small Circle Jiu-Jitsu. I was on a roll, if you like to call it that.

[00:02:40] But then, one day in 1990, all that changed. Instantly. I woke up. I couldn't move. Literally could not move.

[00:02:53] Over the next two years, it was sort of worked out that I'd actually got chronic rheumatoid arthritis.

[00:03:01] I'd never heard of it. Something new to me. Never knew what it was.

[00:03:07] And I remember sitting in the doctor's office, the consultant's office at the Derbyshire Royal Infirmary with Dr. Summers.

[00:03:15] And he told me that my career, my policing career, which was in its infancy, was at an end because the illness would be too debilitated for me to carry on.

[00:03:23] My martial arts career, out the window, forget that. You'll not be able to do it.

[00:03:29] And I sat there completely and utterly stunned.

[00:03:34] I didn't know what to make of it. I had to process it.

[00:03:37] And then I made a decision that was going to change my life forever.

[00:03:43] And that decision was, no, it's not going to happen.

[00:03:48] This arthritis thing isn't going to win.

[00:03:51] We're going to have a bit of a battle, but I'm going to win the war.

[00:03:54] And I made a mantra, which I live my life by today.

[00:03:57] It's we only fail when we stop trying.

[00:04:01] We only fail when we stop trying.

[00:04:04] So from that day, I said to the doctor, who was quite willing to get me a letter to send to Derbyshire police,

[00:04:11] to say this man needs to be pensioned off because his illness will be too debilitating for him to be able to carry on.

[00:04:18] He told me that martial arts was no longer an option for me.

[00:04:22] Now, I only have three passions.

[00:04:25] Policing, martial arts and Northern Soul music.

[00:04:27] I can always listen to the music. That's not a problem.

[00:04:30] And I said to him, and I remember saying it,

[00:04:33] no, it's not going to happen.

[00:04:35] And I was thinking all the time, because by this time, to say I was frightened would be an understatement.

[00:04:43] Martial arts was me.

[00:04:46] It was part of my DNA.

[00:04:49] Without it, I don't know whether I could exist.

[00:04:51] And I remembered that fear has two acronyms.

[00:04:54] The first one is F everything and run.

[00:04:56] And the second one is face everything and rise.

[00:05:00] I chose to do the latter.

[00:05:02] So I said to the doctor, you keep me working.

[00:05:05] I'm not stopping my police career.

[00:05:07] I'm not stopping my martial arts career.

[00:05:09] And you're going to carry on.

[00:05:10] I'm going to fight it.

[00:05:11] And I remember him sitting there rocking back in his chair a bit, a bit taken aback.

[00:05:15] And then he smiled and he said, you know what?

[00:05:18] Good. I'll help you all I can.

[00:05:20] And to his credit was as good as his word until the day he retired.

[00:05:24] Now these days, my illness is in remission.

[00:05:29] However, it's done a lot of damage.

[00:05:31] And it continues to do damage.

[00:05:33] That's the nature of the disease.

[00:05:36] But we only fail when we stop trying.

[00:05:41] So the second part of my life was dealing with this new way of existing, this new way of living.

[00:05:47] Some days, I would cry with pain.

[00:05:50] I would be hospitalized for weeks.

[00:05:53] I'd be lying in hospital.

[00:05:55] I can remember this to this day.

[00:05:56] It was a sunny day like this.

[00:05:57] I just got one sheet on me and even the weight of that sheet on my joints was too much.

[00:06:04] I was crying with pain.

[00:06:07] And I understood then that this was a battle I can't afford to lose.

[00:06:12] I've got to win this war.

[00:06:15] I made a decision.

[00:06:16] I'm going to go forward.

[00:06:18] It's not going to stop me.

[00:06:20] I'm going to move forward.

[00:06:21] It's only pain.

[00:06:23] Only pain.

[00:06:24] Okay.

[00:06:25] Only people with RA can appreciate how much pain you can actually be in.

[00:06:29] If you can imagine having a knitting needle stuck in your joint and then somebody trying to dislocate it, that goes some way to explaining it.

[00:06:36] That can be on one joint.

[00:06:38] It can be in every single joint at any one time.

[00:06:42] Even this morning before I came out to travel here, I had a bit of a twinge this morning.

[00:06:47] I was a little bit late to get to the person who's gave me a lift here today.

[00:06:51] So you never know when it's going to hit you.

[00:06:54] And I've given this enemy of mine a name.

[00:06:56] I call him Arthur.

[00:06:59] And me and Arthur, we've had some arguments.

[00:07:02] We've had one this morning.

[00:07:04] Put him back in his box.

[00:07:05] Got dressed.

[00:07:07] Moved on.

[00:07:08] There were some days when I couldn't even put my socks on.

[00:07:10] My goal was to put my socks on.

[00:07:13] There were some days when I was a bit more mobile.

[00:07:15] I was going to do 10 punches on the Makawara.

[00:07:17] And I just managed to do 10 punches.

[00:07:19] Before I do 100, not a problem.

[00:07:22] But we only fail when we stop trying.

[00:07:26] And that's the mantra I keep up here every single day.

[00:07:30] So, you move forward.

[00:07:34] As a martial arts instructor, and proud to be so, we are in a very privileged position.

[00:07:42] People come to us with all sorts of stories and all sorts of problems.

[00:07:46] Everybody you teach, everybody you meet will be fighting some kind of battle.

[00:07:49] You don't know what that is.

[00:07:51] But our role as martial arts instructors is to make a difference.

[00:07:57] To facilitate change.

[00:07:58] Change.

[00:08:00] So, how can we do that?

[00:08:01] How can I do it?

[00:08:02] I facilitated change in my own life by simply being too stupid to stop doing what I was doing.

[00:08:08] Too stubborn to stop.

[00:08:10] And having a great love of martial arts and what I did.

[00:08:14] And every day, I say the same thing.

[00:08:17] You only fail when you stop trying.

[00:08:20] It doesn't matter what it is.

[00:08:22] It doesn't have to be martial arts.

[00:08:23] It can be anything you like in your life.

[00:08:25] But the martial arts mindset is a fantastic thing.

[00:08:29] Because it gives you a skill set that's quite unique.

[00:08:34] Every long-term martial artist has tenacity.

[00:08:38] It's what keeps you in the game.

[00:08:40] It's what keeps you training.

[00:08:41] It's what keeps you pushing for when it hurts.

[00:08:43] When it's too cold.

[00:08:44] When it's too wet.

[00:08:45] When you don't want to do it anymore.

[00:08:47] When you can't get something right.

[00:08:48] That tenacity is there.

[00:08:50] And that tenacity allows people to travel further.

[00:08:54] And do more than they ever thought possible.

[00:08:57] It's a very powerful tool.

[00:09:00] It certainly made me a better person.

[00:09:03] With tenacity, we've also got self-awareness.

[00:09:07] And that self-awareness is a very valuable thing.

[00:09:10] It gives you an understanding of yourself and what you're all about.

[00:09:15] It can give you some self-confidence.

[00:09:18] And if you need it, it can restore your self-worth.

[00:09:20] Which is perhaps the biggest gift you can give to somebody.

[00:09:23] And I'll tell you a story about that in a minute.

[00:09:25] So we only fail when we stop trying.

[00:09:28] I had a lady come to me a little while ago.

[00:09:31] An ophthalmic surgeon.

[00:09:32] And she was taking private lessons from me.

[00:09:35] Now I'm a retired domestic violence detective.

[00:09:38] And one day, we were having a lesson.

[00:09:41] And my spidey sense said, something's not right here.

[00:09:45] So I asked her the question, at the risk of losing a student, is everything alright at home?

[00:09:50] And it all came out.

[00:09:52] Years of abuse and God knows what else.

[00:09:55] But the point I make is this.

[00:09:56] That night she went home and her husband attacked her.

[00:10:00] She'd known enough from what I told her to be able to get away.

[00:10:04] And from that day on, we'd be supporting her.

[00:10:06] That's making a difference.

[00:10:07] But what I try to tell her is,

[00:10:10] if you only stop trying, that's when you'll fail.

[00:10:13] We only fail when we stop trying.

[00:10:14] We've got to keep moving forward.

[00:10:16] So all through the court case, through the subsequent divorce,

[00:10:20] she's there all the time.

[00:10:22] I keep telling her, keep moving.

[00:10:24] It will get better.

[00:10:27] You've got this all the time.

[00:10:29] And you have to tell that to yourself, no matter what you're doing.

[00:10:33] I am very lucky still to be able to teach and train.

[00:10:38] But I had to change what I did.

[00:10:40] I had to relearn my entire martial arts curriculum.

[00:10:44] Before I was fast and strong.

[00:10:47] Now I wasn't.

[00:10:48] I got to learn to do things properly.

[00:10:51] And any long-term martial artists will know,

[00:10:53] we all go through those motions whereby you actually,

[00:10:55] you're doing stuff, but you're not doing it right.

[00:10:57] But you're getting away with it because to a certain event,

[00:10:59] you're blagging it because you're fast and you're strong and you're young.

[00:11:02] When you get older, that doesn't work so much.

[00:11:04] And as a result of that,

[00:11:07] I met people I never would have met.

[00:11:10] I've been to places I never would have thought I would ever get to.

[00:11:13] Here today is one example.

[00:11:16] I taught all over the world.

[00:11:17] I've taught in Sicily, all over Europe, America.

[00:11:20] I'm set to go to America next year to teach in Washington.

[00:11:23] But the point is this.

[00:11:26] You have to tell yourself you can do it.

[00:11:30] The only person that can do it is you.

[00:11:33] And if you think about failing,

[00:11:35] remember that fail is only the start of your next attempt.

[00:11:40] Fail stands for first attempt in learning.

[00:11:43] It's not the end.

[00:11:45] It's the start of your next go.

[00:11:47] We only fail when we stop trying.

[00:11:51] This is the key.

[00:11:53] So it doesn't matter.

[00:11:54] Some days, even now I can't walk or I might limp a little bit,

[00:11:59] but I get to the academy, put my gear on, teach.

[00:12:03] I come home, cry because I'm in pain,

[00:12:05] set up some painkillers, go back the next day.

[00:12:09] Because we only fail when we stop trying.

[00:12:13] The message I want to get through today is this.

[00:12:16] We only fail when we stop trying.

[00:12:18] We have to keep moving.

[00:12:19] It doesn't matter what life throws in front of you.

[00:12:22] Everybody has bumps in the road.

[00:12:25] I've had a bump and a bit of a detour, but I come back to it.

[00:12:29] The people I've met and trained with have been inspirational in themselves.

[00:12:33] Fiume de Mora, before he finally died,

[00:12:37] had actually had an operation and died three times on the operating table.

[00:12:40] And I was talking to him.

[00:12:41] I said, Sensi, what was it like?

[00:12:43] He said, well, I died three times.

[00:12:45] I said, yes, I know you did.

[00:12:45] He said, well, first time I went down there.

[00:12:47] Too hot, not stay.

[00:12:49] I'll come back.

[00:12:50] I said, oh, okay.

[00:12:51] Second time I go up there, very boring, come back.

[00:12:55] Third time, I stay here.

[00:12:59] What can you do with a philosophy like that?

[00:13:02] And people like that, that I've been lucky enough to meet,

[00:13:04] have been my mentors, my friends, my teachers,

[00:13:07] allowed me to pass my skills on to others.

[00:13:10] And it's incumbent on us, as an industry,

[00:13:14] to make that change in people.

[00:13:18] I can only do it if I keep moving forward.

[00:13:20] If I remember my mantra, you only fail when you stop trying.

[00:13:25] We've all got students that will fail a grading or fail a test.

[00:13:29] We move forward.

[00:13:30] Try and make them understand why they failed,

[00:13:35] give them the tool to move forward and facilitate that change.

[00:13:39] It's incumbent upon us, as martial arts instructors,

[00:13:43] to force or make change in people,

[00:13:46] to make them better people, to make them wiser people.

[00:13:50] Martial arts is far more than just kicking and punching.

[00:13:54] Anybody can do that.

[00:13:56] Anybody.

[00:13:58] It's far more than that.

[00:13:59] It's a way of life.

[00:14:00] It's a philosophy.

[00:14:01] It's a way of living your life.

[00:14:05] It's what we do every day.

[00:14:09] In fact, one of my instructors used to say,

[00:14:11] everywhere is the dojo.

[00:14:14] Life is the dojo.

[00:14:17] Work every day in the dojo.

[00:14:19] Whether you're actually training in your gear or your suit,

[00:14:21] or whatever it is, you're still training.

[00:14:23] Every day is an experience.

[00:14:25] And the thing you have to remember is,

[00:14:27] you only fail when you stop trying.

[00:14:31] It's a simple message,

[00:14:34] but it's so profound to my life.

[00:14:36] And I look at it through my eyes.

[00:14:40] God, in his wisdom, gave me the ability to communicate.

[00:14:44] He gave me some degree of ability to teach.

[00:14:48] And he gave me an illness that was to teach me how strong I was.

[00:14:53] Because I didn't realise how strong I was.

[00:14:55] It tested my physical strength.

[00:14:57] It tested my psychological strength.

[00:14:59] It tested me to the limit and a bit beyond.

[00:15:03] And I'm thankful for that because it made me a better instructor.

[00:15:09] It made me understand why things worked

[00:15:12] because I had to relearn stuff with a different set of eyes.

[00:15:16] It made me empathetic to my students

[00:15:18] who might be struggling with the technique.

[00:15:20] I taught many, many people with disabilities.

[00:15:22] I would never have done that before.

[00:15:24] I was too selfish.

[00:15:26] And I freely admit it.

[00:15:30] But this change in me actually got me the rank that I've got.

[00:15:34] Because I met people that wanted to facilitate my progress.

[00:15:38] We only fail when we stop trying.

[00:15:44] The Japanese have a saying,

[00:15:46] get knocked down seven times, stand up eight.

[00:15:50] It's about resilience.

[00:15:53] Nobody is going to come to your aid.

[00:15:56] They did, you know, even the medics that came to me,

[00:15:59] it was down to me to decide that my illness wasn't going to win.

[00:16:03] It was down to me to decide what I was going to do with the rest of my life.

[00:16:07] Do I lie down and give in or do I fight?

[00:16:10] Anybody that knows me knows it's always going to be the latter.

[00:16:13] I've never gone anywhere quietly in my life.

[00:16:15] But we only fail when we stop trying.

[00:16:19] So every day, no matter what you're doing,

[00:16:22] give it your best shot.

[00:16:24] Try.

[00:16:24] Try.

[00:16:26] What have you got to lose?

[00:16:27] And you've got everything to gain.

[00:16:29] Thank you very much for your time.

[00:16:31] Be well and stay safe.

[00:16:33] Thank you.